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Tuesday, April 20, 2021

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Things all Non-Vegetarian Friends Tell Their Vegetarian Friends

You could be on any side of this infinite debate, but here are some quips that we promise you have witnessed/spoken/endorsed, whatever.

Oh, dear Vegetarians, we sympathize with the plight you suffer on all meals when you have a bunch of ravenous non-vegetarian friends for company.

Upholding and clinging to your vegetarian choices is what makes you what you are. And the relentless onslaught of these lines does not deter you from your green food trek.

As for the chicken lovers, mutton maniacs and fish fanatics, or just te non-vegetarians, their endeavors dedicated to converting their vegetarian friends into non-vegetarians are nothing short of colossal. The persistence and determination displayed in these acts, if channelized in their careers, could possibly bag them Nobel prizes.

And of course, the statements, accusations, threats, and jibes enlisted here, will make you recall of each instance when you encountered these. Also, the staple lines that you are simply waiting to hear on each dinner/lunch plan.

1. “Ghaas-phoos wale log”

Perhaps we will never truly understand the uncanny relationship that each non-vegetarian manages to establish between non-vegetarianism and all things grassy and leafy.

2. “Moksha pana ho toh chicken khana padega”

Chicken khaogay tab samajh aayega ki life mein kya miss kar rahe ho. Your life is devoid of the best flavors. And the similar permutations of this continue. Basically, the supreme happiness of your life is supposed to stem from chicken breasts and culminate at the thigh.

3. “India ke bahar jao, sab khaane lagogay”

Another one of those conjectures that manage to puzzle and deter many faithful vegetarians is that beyond Indian borders, you are going to ultimately turn to non-vegetarian food. And vegetarians abroad go like-

Kuch Bhi

4. “Paneer tera chicken and Poha teri Biryani”

Well, non-vegetarians will never let go of any opportunity to relate the humble vegetarian food items with their flamboyant non-vegetarian dishes. At this point, it’s rather futile to highlight the fundamental difference in them. Each vegetarian has to get a mouthful of it.


5. “Bas gravy le lo”

Yeah, that one gets your eyebrows soaring. When the non-veg pieces have been swimming in that pool of spices, its automatically disqualified to go into my mouth. Plain and simple. There is no by-passing there.

Are you kidding me

6. “There is no such thing as veg biryani or kebab”

No one gets as ethnocentric as a non-vegetarian when it comes to adding the ‘veg’ prefix to its invincible food heroes. The offense level at labeling their beloved biryani and kebab as veg is way too blasphemous.

No vegetarian

7. “Bf/ Gf ko kiss karogay agay wo non-vegetarian hongay?”

A big and unwarranted point of concern for many non-vegetarian friends. They simply cannot resist poking their nose in this matter.

Non of your business

8. “Cakes kaise khate ho? Usme toh egg hota hai!”

Pinpointing at every food item that is off the list is a thrill that non-vegetarian friends have and adding to that list are cakes. No one knows what is it going to take to tell them all that eggless cakes co-exist harmoniously in this world.

9. “Protein kaise lete ho?”

Let the mystery prevail. Let them ponder to their grave how vegetarians stay alive and lead a normal life without proteins from chicken and fish. As green-lovers, they have probably resigned from the job of explaining how other food items, miraculously possesses the requisite nutrition.

10. “Ek din tumhare khane mein chicken mila dunga”

When your friends are capable of all kinds of gimmicks, this threat just comes across as too real. And a definite one to give you all goosebumps.

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